HPB Voices Reloaded
March-April 2005
Fancy a chuckle? Catch our laugh lines here!
“The best doctor is the veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter— he's got to just know.”
~ Will Rogers (1879-1935) American humorist & writer
At a Health Camp for Staff (Organised by HealthZone, Supported by Healthy Workforce Committee):
Camp Master: What are some good hygiene habits you need to observe?
6-yr old kid: Do not put your finger into your backside and then put it in your mouth!
Top three reasons to be a statistician:
- I always wanted to learn the entire Greek alphabet.
- We do it with confidence, frequency, and variability.
- You never have to be right - only close.
You know you are a nurse if … you refuse to watch ER because it's too much like the real thing and triggers ‘flash backs’.
Marketing is not an event, but a process . . . It has a beginning, a middle, but never an end, for it is a process. You improve it, perfect it, change it, even pause it. But you never stop it completely.
- Jay Conrad Levinson
Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes.
Patient: And how much will it cost?
Dentist: It's $90.00.
Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.